Birth and beyond – have you got a Plan B?

Being Sarah Chilton - Ruth BriddonToday’s guest blog is from Ruth Briddon who has just published a new novel ‘Being Sarah Chilton’. It has been described as:  If ‘Bridget Jones’ had a child and then was left on her tod, this book is what would happen next! A guide for all Mums when the sh*t hits the fan.’ Here Ruth tells her story of how she became a mum, the problems she faced and how this lead her to write a book with a heroine that will resonate with so many mums. We have ten copies of the book to give away. Simply leave a comment below to enter.

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I was 33 and my husband was 36 when we decided that we’d like to start a family. We’d Ruth Briddoncompleted most things on our list of ‘things to do before you start a family’.  We had just agreed on an extension to the house when I found out I was pregnant. Not good timing! I couldn’t see a lot through my rose coloured glasses so just went along with everything. I knew I was ready to have a baby and, at 33, this was the decade it was going to happen so accepted it.

I watched baby programmes, saw lots of deliveries, which looked fine to be honest. Read magazines and kept track on how big baby was. Carried out lots of research on which pram to buy and what colour scheme I’d like in the nursery. I attended local antenatal classes at the hospital, which are a distant memory now but I remember them showing us around the delivery suite, which is such a good idea. We also talked about pain relief and still births. Never any mention of the emotional effects being pregnant, or a new mum, can have on you. Mind you, I know I wouldn’t have listened to this and thought it was a stupid idea to discuss because I wanted a baby and knew I was mentally ready so what else is there to talk about and consider?

To condense my story and avoid writing another book, my birth went nothing like the births I watched on television i.e two coughs and a push and ‘oh look you’ve got a baby’. I was induced, had a 27 hour labour and an emergency c-section. I was in shock but had to hit the ground running, whilst holding a baby and endure a blood transfusion. Not good.

I had terrible regrets about having a baby and, looking back, had Postnatal Depression, but no one picked up on this, which to this day I will always wonder how and why. Five months later my husband announced he was leaving me for someone else, someone he’d been having an affair with for eighteen months.

Bring the clock forward six years and I’ve got my life back on track and obtained my counselling diploma and am pushing hard to tell my story in Children’s Centres and hospitals.  If you feel so passionately about something and really think you could make an impact, then never give up. I didn’t and I now talk at three Children’s Centres, Newton Abbot, Ivybridge and Kingsbridge. I teach expectant parents the importance of preparing mentally for birth and provide them with their Plan B if things go wrong for them.

In April 2010 I was introduced to an editor, Kate Osborne of the Solarus Foundation. I had started to write bits and pieces as I had kept a diary when my husband left. I found it very cathartic and it removed the negative thoughts in my head and left some space in there for pleasant things instead of constant worries. I asked her to read some of the work I had done and she told me I just had to write a book as so many women would relate to it. I am so proud of my work. Sarah is a great character. She says what all us new mums are thinking but just can’t say because motherhood is what we wanted and why would we have any negative thoughts? She’s based on many people I know; some people ask if it’s based on my life because Sarah went through similar experiences to me; however, I have a fab imagination and decided that I needed an evil villain in the book so invented Chris, who turns into Voldermort at one point, but you’ll have to read the book to found out how and why!

Being Sarah Chilton

Of course, there are some of my own experiences in there, but I will leave that to the readers to debate what these are. Sarah will resonate with so many mums and I thoroughly enjoyed developing her character, having listened to other women talk in cafe’s, restaurants, play centres etc. It’s amazing how much us mums open up in these places! She’s been on a life changing journey; Postnatal Depression, learning how to deal with the stigma that’s sometimes attached to being a single mum, become a counsellor, to name but three,  but the journey has only just begun for her. I’ve started her next adventure and once Netmums members have read Sarah’s story, I would be so interested to hear what they think she’ll be up to next!

Being Sarah Chilton is a book you can read in a short space of time. Sarah doesn’t make things sound pink and fluffy, she just says it, ready or not. The reader will chart her recovery from Postnatal Depression and she gives you tips on how to help yourself but to also accept yourself and how you are feeling. I’ve grown very fond of her and you should see what she’s going to do in book two!

Follow @BeingSarahChilt on Twitter

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Win….win…win

We have ten copies of Being Sarah Chilton to giveaway. Leave a comment on this blog andBeing Sarah Chilton - Ruth Briddon from all comments received by midnight on 31st May we will pick out ten lucky winners. We  read the book and couldn’t put it down – it’s just brilliant. It’s the kind of book you want to share with other mums and is well worth a read.

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This entry was posted in Authors, Books and reading, Competition, depression, motherhood, post natal depression, Pregnancy and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

125 Responses to Birth and beyond – have you got a Plan B?

  1. This book sounds like a Godsend! I was reading the post and then got to the part about Kingsbridge! That’s where I live too!! 😀 Small world….

  2. Emma Miller says:

    I love books on motherhood. They are so funny because normally I can relate to so much in them being a mum of 2 young children!

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi Emma, there’s something in there for everyone! You should see Sarah’s version of the CBeebies goodnight song! x

  3. Emily says:

    This book sounds like a Godsend! I live in Kingsbridge~ what a small world! 😀

  4. Hayley batters says:

    Is this available on e books please sounds like a book I wanna read 🙂

    • Yes it is available as an e-book too

      • Ruth Briddon says:

        Hi Hayley
        You can certainly order an ebook. If you log on to Amazon.co.uk and google “Being Sarah Chilton” it will take you to my book and you click on the ebook link from there. Thanks very much for your support. x

  5. siobhan from Netmums says:

    Well done Ruth for turning your really tough experience into something so positive. I’m looking forward to reading about myself (I mean Sarah Chiltern)!

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Thanks Siobhan! I think a lot of women will relate to Sarah. She says exactly what she’s thinking and doesn’t care who hears! x

  6. brummiemummy says:

    This book sounds great! Well done for turning your negative experiences into positive ones, I know I couldn’t have done that 🙂

  7. brummiemummy says:

    This book sounds like a great read. I think it’s fantastic that you’ve turned your negative experiences around and made the best of everything 🙂

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi, thank you! My experience of being left with a 5 month old after learning that your husband was having an affair, didnt really sink in until my son, Alex, was about 18 months. I absolutely loved developing Sarah’s character. She made me laugh and cry and I was the one writing the book! x

  8. Stephanie Morriss says:

    I look forward to reading this and hope I win one – but if I dont I will buy it anyway!!!!

  9. Nic says:

    I can relate to much of this. Sounds like a good read (if I have time!)

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi Nic, Sarah’s journal isn’t huge and you can read bits at a time. If you need a laugh then she’s guaranted to provide that for you! x

  10. amanda hayes says:

    I’d love to read this book! I had a totally totally suprise baby and you do question wether you will regret it or not. Sounds like a great read 🙂

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Thanks Amanda. Being a parent is something we all think we’ll adjust to from day one, but I always liken it to starting a new career. Hope you enjoy the book x

  11. lacey0302 says:

    I read the story about being a mum at 40 whilst I was pregnant, which was cathartic, as I was feeling guilty at being an older mum. This sounds like a similar book for mums. Amazing how having a baby can change everything about your life. Like Sarah Clinton, I think that having a baby is starting to give me more focus in life. I look forward to reading the book.

  12. Catrin Ashton says:

    This sounds like a book many will relate too. I’m surprised how often I hear of postnatal depression not being picked up on. It seemed like every midwife or doctor’s appointment I’m being asked about my mood.

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi Catrin, I hear so often about PND not being picked up and how GPs are too quick to prescribe anti depressants. These just mask the symptoms and it should be addressed. I hope to start groups for mums and dads who are finding it difficult adjusting to parenthood. I’ll be holding debriefing sessions and they can learn coping techniques and offload their thoughts. x

  13. Sara says:

    Well done Ruth and congratulations on the book, sounds like a fantastic read.

  14. AutismMumma says:

    I love books on motherhood, always found reading others experiences very useful.
    Would love to get my mitts on a copy!

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Oooo good luck with the competition then! Sarah’s available on Kindle too at a very good price. x

  15. Justine says:

    I can’t wait to read this, it looks exactly the kind of thing I want and need to read. Hopefully someone who has experienced what I have!

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi Justine
      Sarah’s been through the mill and back and she’s living proof that life can, and does, go on and get better. I love the fact that she openly admits to not coping and enjoying motherhood in the early stages. She’ll make you laugh as she says what 99% of new mums think but just don’t think they should. Better out than in is Sarah’s motto! x

  16. sithara says:

    I’d love to read this book!

  17. nicole kemp says:

    this book sounds brilliant!! love stuff like this 🙂

  18. Elsie macpherson says:

    The sh*t hit the fan with our new baby experience, I can hardly remember the first 6 months of our sons life. No more babies for us, no more one born every minute or baby diaries either!

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      Hi Elsie, I can relate to the first 6 months being a blur. It’s a shame when you feel like that as it’s not what the media tell us it’s going to be like is it?! I focus on now and don’t look back as I can’t change that. My son, Alex, is ten and I’m still finding ways to bond with him and build our relationship. I watched the first episode of One Born every Minute and nearly through my dinner at the TV as I found it very annoying as there was a man blowing up rubber gloves and laughing at his wife. I wanted to hit him!! Best wishes, Ruth x

  19. Sudha says:

    This book looks good, and something one can relate to… Looking forward to reading it!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Danielle
      Sarah will guarantee laughs, gasps and tears and probably a few nods in agreement as her experiences and thoughts are the same as others!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  20. Natalia says:

    Sounds like a great read, much needed by many new mums, to reassure that we are not on our own.

    • Ruth Briddon says:

      That Natalia
      I think all mums will relate to Sarah in some way. I wanted her to be someone who isn’t afraid to say what she’s feeling and to own her thoughts and admit to them. x

  21. Ruth Briddon says:

    Hi everyone. Thank you so much for your messages. Good luck with the competition! I will be holding some book signing sessions in my area soon (Torbay, Devon), but will be visiting family in Yorkshire (near Harrogate) in August so would love to come and sign some books for you and meet you.

    I’m currently writing book two and would love to hear what you think Sarah will be up to. She’ll still be outspoken and probably attempt internet dating again, but she’ll be trying her own version of a super diet, a diet to fix all our worries!

    If you are pregnant and would like to attend one of my ‘Plan B’ group sessions, please let me know. Also, if you are a new parent and would be interested in attending an “Expectations v Reality” debrief session, again, I’d love to hear from you. I’m based in Torquay, Devon, but can visit the surrounding areas. Please contact me for more information. Very best wishes, Ruth xx
    http://www.postnatalsupport.com

  22. Karis says:

    This book sounds really inspirational, I am pregnant with my first baby and think this will be an amazing read.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Karis
      All the very best to you. Sarah is very outspoken and honest and I believe many mums will thank her for being so honest and speaking out.
      All the best
      Ruth x

  23. Nicola heaps says:

    “If you feel so passionately about something and really think you could make an impact, then never give up” these words have given me the kick up the butt I need today, thank you . I will quote you as my Facebook status!

    • ruth briddon says:

      From when Alex was two weeks old I knew I’d do something to help people. It’s taken me a few years but I refused to give up. Whilst we know what we want to do we’re not always in control of when it will happen. Best wishes, Ruth x

  24. Ansu says:

    Sounds fab, I would love to have a read! I too became a first time mum at 33 and after a very labour was induced and had an emergency c section, something I’d always dreaded but when it came down to it, surprised myself at how I dealt with it all including the whole motherhood thing.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Ansu
      Our birthing experiences seem to be the same! Good luck with the competition.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  25. Danielle McMeekin says:

    Sounds like a great book to have on the shelf! Really looking forward to reading it (buying one if I don’t win :p). It’s exciting that your already onto writing book 2 so also looking forward to that one!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Danielle
      I hope you enjoy the book. I’d love to hear ideas of what people think Sarah will be up to in book 2!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  26. Samantha Fenn says:

    Sounds like a great read… having just had my 2nd baby 3 weeks ago i’m sure i’ll be nodding my head in agreement at many parts of it =)

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Samantha
      Congratulations on the birth of baby number 2! I’m sure you will be nodding!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  27. Liz Pitcher says:

    This sounds like a must read for new parents and parents to be. I’ve got three children and expecting number 4 in September. I sometime laugh to myself at the plans I made before baby number 1, I know better know after 3 previous pregnancies and labours! I really look forward to reading this book as I think I will really relate to it. Hope I win a copy!!! 🙂

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Liz
      I know so many people who laugh at their expectations with baby number 1. Like you, being on their 2nd or 3rd, they’re so relaxed because they know what to expect, have experienced it all before and are quite laid back.
      All the best for the competition!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  28. I believe its a huge shock to many Mums and remains one of those unspoken taboos a lot of the time. Our birth experiences sound very similar, not an easy ride at all.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning starryslippers (love that name!)
      It can be an overwhelming shock, especially when society and the media portray it as this fantastic journey and experience. Depression is an illness and something we can’t decide whether or not to have. I know my Plan B helps people prepare as so many mums speak to me after my talks and thank me for bringing up the subject of not coping. Not that I like people to cry but I come away feeling so happy that I’ve helped a Mum realise that PND is not a taboo subject and that there’s somewhere she can go if she’s not well. It annoys me that we are advanced with so much in this world but depression, I feel, is still something people don’t like to admit to having.
      I hope all is well with you now and good luck with the competition.
      Very best wishes
      Ruth x

  29. Laura T says:

    i think this will be my problem, im set on having a waterbirth, i want it as naturel as possible (evven if comes to not having water) rather be mobile etc etc, if something happened and all went out the window think i would be devastated and wouldnt have a clue what to do and even be sorely tempted home birth instead of going into hospital!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Laura
      It’s important to keep your options flexible. Remember that mother nature will decide how baby comes out. Write down your ‘wish list’ and then analyse if you like what your reaction would be if the opposite was to happen i.e. you wanted a home birth but ended up being in hopsital. How did that make you feel? Why did your midwife decide that hospital was the best option? What could have been the outcome if you stuck to your guns and had a home birth? This ‘expectation v reality’ can be an invaluable tool if you are not feeling right after your birth as you analyse your thoughts and eliminate the ones you feel aren’t bothering you.
      Let me know if I can help you further Laura, I’d love to hear from you.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  30. Iisa says:

    This book sounds really good, I’m 36 and currently pregnant with my second child and having a rough pregnancy at times I’m finding it a struggle and wondering if we did the right thing having another, I know deep down we are but I’ve found it’s a topic you can’t chat about even to get things off your chest as people look at you gone out, like you have to heads lol Good luck with the book, I look forward to reading it xxx

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Lisa
      I, indeed, felt I had two heads sometimes so know how you feel! I always stuck firmly to my feelings and didnt deny them. I had to get myself better so wrote down how I felt and processed my thoughts.
      Please feel free to email me if you would like to offload any thoughts you have. I can guarantee you that you wont be the first to have thought them.

      http://Www.postnatalsupport.com

      Take care
      Ruth x

  31. Sarah says:

    It sounds like just the book I need right now. Looking forward to reading it x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Sarah
      Hope all ok? Sarah will guarantee you a laugh that’s for sure!
      Take care and good luck with the competition
      Ruth x

  32. Candace says:

    Sounds like a great read and a book many women, myself included, can relate to.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Candace
      I know Sarah will reasonate with sooooo many women and I’m so pleased she’s become an ambassdor for PND and shouts to the world that it’s ok not to cope and adapt straightaway.
      Book two has been started!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  33. Tracey says:

    Sounds like a good read & lots of things in it to makes u realise it doesn’t just happen to u!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Tracey
      Sarah has two chapters on internet dating for the reader to contend with and it’s enough to put them off for life! She speaks her mind and is such a determined woman. I’m very proud of her and decided she needs a sequel 😉
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  34. lisa says:

    Just checked out the introduction to your book during bedtime bliss period, well the 1yr old is crying & I’m waiting for the stairs to creak from my 4yr old. Sounds like a good read is it out now? Thanks

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Lisa
      You’ve made me laugh! Bedtime Bliss, love it! Can I use that in book two?! My ten year old still tries to creap back downstairs, sometimes he succeeds and I nearly die of heart failure! You can order the paperback now and Amazon are sending them out, even though it’s not out until 31st May. You can also preorder the Kindle version.
      Sorry for the delay in replying to you too.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  35. Rachel Smith says:

    Hi Ruth,
    Congratulations on the book – where on earth did you find the time?! I’m 36 and currently expecting number 2 in July and finding it much harder this time round. Am keeping my fingers crossed I win a copy as it looks like a fab read (though it may have a thick layer of dust on it by the time I actually get the time to read it!). All the best with Sarah’s new adventures 🙂

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Rachel
      Good luck with your impending birth, hope it all goes well for you.

      I was very strict with my writing. My son, Alex, spends every other weekend with his Dad so I would religiously sit down from 10 – 4 on Saturday and Sunday and write. I’ve found a real passion for it and have music playing in the background to inspire me.

      The book isn’t a long one, it’s more of a journal, but because I love writing and have also had such lovely feedback from people, I’ve decided that Sarah deserves a sequel!

      All the best for July.
      Ruth x

  36. Aanda says:

    This book sounds like what every mother to be needs. I tried for 3years to have my little boy and 3pregnancies and nothing can really prepare you. Just started trying for baby number 2 looking forward to reading your book. Good luck x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Aanda
      I agree, people under estimate the achievement of giving birth and being a parent. Sarah does actually think she’s lost her baby at one point and her heart goes out to people who have experienced this. X

      I hope everything works out for you.
      Very best wishes
      Ruth x

  37. Dawn says:

    I used to be an avid reader prior to having 3 children in 18 months ( work that one out!) and I feel that I have recently started to wake up from the crazy dream I have been living for the last 4 years, only to look in the mirror and see a woman who is a far cry from the ‘mother earth’ I always imagined I would be! Looking forward to reading some honest words about the emotional roller coaster that is motherhood!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Dawn
      Wow! My maths is rubbish but how on earth are you still sane?! Being a parent is rewarding and mentally and physically exhausting at the same time! I often look back at what I’ve achieved and we all need to do it.
      I wrote a Motherhood Poem in which I admit that being a parent is like being on a roller coaster. Sarah is a very dear character to me. Whilst some of her experiences mirror mine, I like the reader to guess which ones they are 😉
      Hope you’re having a relaxing Sunday as it sounds like you deserve one!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  38. michelle higgs says:

    aww a true story that most mums have gone through, its nice shes shared it! would love to win this to read x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Michelle
      Sarah found that writing things down was really cathartic. I loved developing her character and felt it was important to have a character who didnt do the pink and fluffy stuff we all hear about parenthood. It’s amazing the material you can pick up by listening to mums in the playground and coffee shops!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  39. Candice says:

    As a new mum, this sounds like a great read. I think the more experiences we hear or and share the more strength we all gain when our own roads hit a bump!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Candice
      I agree. It’s really important for new mums and dads to not wear a mask of happiness all the time. Take it off and show the world how you really feel, but more importantly own your feelings and accept them. Sarah’s road hit a major bump and after severe concussion she carried on!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  40. Amy says:

    I’d love a copy please! After a rocky road to motherhood myself, and now a proud semi-sane mum to 3 boys…..i love nothing more than reading books about other mums exsperiances 🙂

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Amy
      Gook luck with the competition! Sarah’s experiences will make you laugh and cry so hope you enjoy it. I agree though, I don’t think you are completely sane when you’re a parent!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  41. lynne says:

    im intrigued to here what happens throughout the journey of this book and so if i wasnt to win, i will be buying it to find out. being a parent its something that i was definitely not prepared for as much as i thought it was, and even over 5 years later, its ever surprising x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Lynne
      Good luck with the competition!
      Sarah’s a great girl and she’ll tell you exactly how she feels ready or not! My son is 10 and I’m still learning what to do. Apparently, according to my mum, you never stop worrying! Reassuring words!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  42. Helen White says:

    Thank goodness – someone who tells the truth about parenthood!!! Look forward to reading it x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Helen
      Oh Sarah will definitely tell you how it is! I’m very proud of how she’s grown and adapted to her single life, hope you do too.
      Good luck with the competition.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  43. minddynamo says:

    Sequel: daughter starts school…..

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Minddynamo (fab name!)
      Senior or Junior school?! Sarah’s experienced the Junior school phase and is not looking forward to the Senior school experience, where hair will appear to sprout on Jo-Jo and he’ll develop an unpleasant smell and sluggish attitude. Wish her luck!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  44. Ruth Briddon says:

    Morning everyone!
    thank you all for your comments, which make the blood sweat and tears in writing the book all worthwhile. Our Sarahs on Facebook too and in book two she’ll be helping women with varying versions of PND and anxiety. Together ladies we’ll eliminate the stigma of not coping and turning into super mum on day one. Have a great day xxx

  45. Very brave and honest of you to admit that it wasn’t all plain sailing. So often we are not allowed to express any feelings of loss or regret, like having a baby will instantly transform us into an Earth Mother/Domestic goddess. It is possible to desparately love your child/children, but to also (and often at the same time) miss bits of your old life. Look forward to reading more.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Sarah
      I believe Sarah will speak for many many mums and I hope that, in turn, this will enable them to admit, and talk about, their thoughts and feelings. She certainly doesn’t do pink and fluffy that’s for sure! I love my free time, always have and always will, but I now don’t get anxiety admitting that. I’m Mum first and Ruth Briddon second, but still feel it’s imperative to have me time as it grounds and refreshes me. My son will always be number 1 in my life but my batteries need recharging every so often and I look forward to my free time and having a good old shop or a glass of wine and a yarn with friends!

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  46. Laura says:

    This book sounds great! Your delivery experience sounds almost identical to mine! I also had PND but was fortunate to have an incredibly supportive husband. The stigma around PND and having to be a super-mummy is immense and puts huge pressure on new mums. After a request from my Health Visitor I volunteered to speak to mums about my experiences, as part of a programme of post-natal classes my local surgery runs, basically telling them its ok not to be perfect!!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Laura

      Totally agree with the unrealistic expectations surrounding new parents. It’s imperative to have support too.
      I don’t know why I expected to be super mum and can only put it down to not being told about the other side of birth i.e PND. If you’re only told about the practical side of things, why would you assume otherwise?

      What a great thing you’re doing too. It’s fantastic that your surgery are doing this. I always feel like the grim reaper when I do similar talks at Children’s Centres, but life isn’t always straightforward is it?!
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  47. Katy K says:

    Sounds like a ‘must read’- I am sure at least some parts of it will resonate with every Mother and it will be nice to read a good book that doesn’t make you feel judged and found lacking! This will definitely be on my holiday reading list.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Katy
      I spoke to a pregnant mum at one of my classes last week. She’s 21 but did look a lot younger and she was worried that people would judge her, especially in supermarkets, if she couldnt stop her baby from crying. I found that really sad and the only thing I could say to her was to be proud of who she is and to only worry about what friends and family think of her.

      I hope you enjoy the book and good luck with the competition.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  48. would love to read this 🙂

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi, good luck with the competion. Hope you win a copy! Failing that, I’m available to purchase on Amazon and Amazon Kindle.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  49. Sounds like you have been through a really tough time, but luckily you have turned things around and are so positive. Well done you!!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Hayley

      I said I was going to get a t-shirt printed once saying ‘ I used to have anxiety but now I’m worried I don’t’. What do you think?! Sarah sees the funny side of things and admits to her feelings and accepts them.

      Good luck with the competition.
      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  50. Laura Christodoulou-jones says:

    I feel that this book will be a great read! I’ve recently had my first baby who is nearly 6months, and like you I watched all sorts of programmes and read books, went to classes, spoke to friends with babies; but nothing and I mean nothing can prepare you to life with a little munchkin! My hubby and I were so emotional after the birth (and I was one of those lucky ones who got a water birth and labour was 10 hours!). Having a baby is such an amazing, life changing thing! Nothing is ever really the same again (in a good way!) and I don’t think you can ever be fully prepared. But it gets easier. And I definitely think that with the next one (when/if!) I will be much more relaxed about things 🙂 xxx

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Laura
      I call my little boy Munchkin too! However, he’s 10 now and I can only say it when it’s just us two around!

      You’re right though about the preparation thing, which is why I have my ‘Plan B’ for expectant parents to read. Mental preparation is vital and it’s not promoted enough in my humble opinion. Being a parent for the first time should be like starting a new career/job. When you go on to have number 2 then you should treat it as if you’ve been promoted to manager of a small team!

      Very best wishes
      Ruth x

  51. Laura Stonehouse says:

    It’s sometimes going through the bad times that we truly see how strong we are.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Laura
      That’s very true and experiencing these bad times can turn us in to the person we were born to be and will carry on being. Life is strange at times and it chucks all sorts at us to test us. Sometimes the challenge is welcome and at other times it’s about as welcome as spots on your wedding day!

      All the best.
      Ruth x

  52. Hayley Adams says:

    I myself have been diagnosed with pnd so am really glad that you have covered this in your book. There needs to be way more awareness of this devistating illness. I really look forward to reading your book, even if i don’t win a copy xx

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Hayley
      This illness is devastating, you’re absolutely right. I felt utter disappointment too and if you’ve never felt this after birth then it’s hard for people to understand. I hope youre receiving the support you need at this time, but please feel free to contact me if you need someone to offload to. Accept how you feel and write it down. Take each day as it comes and break the day down in to small hourly chunks. Set yourself small, achievable, tasks i.e. do the washing up, smile at my baby, write down one positive thing I have done today, no matter how small. I have some helpsheets if you’re interested. You can contact me through my website postnatalsupport.com.

      Thanks for your message and I wish you all the best. You will get better as depression is an illness from which you will recover. Just dont put any time limit on it.

      Very best wishes
      Ruth x

  53. This book sounds great and touches on a lot of relevant points for mums, I will definitely be grabbing myself a copy.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Charlie
      Sarah touches on many subjects, sometimes whether you want to hear them or not!

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  54. Ami says:

    Hi when I read this blog about your book it brought tears to my eyes. I too expected a perfect birth to find myself having spinal block in theatre for rotational forceps after a 36hr labour! This also lead to postnatal depression which took me a long time to realise. I have a lot of regrets! i feel reassured now i am not the only one and I know your book will help alot of women because I don’t think people realise how common it is. I would love to give it a read!

    • ruth briddon says:

      Morning Ami
      Thank you so much for your honest blog. It’s because of mums like you that make me passionate about spreading the PND word. Thankfully, the government are waking up to the fact that PND is an illness and are now pouring resources into training midwives and health visitors spot the signs. They are under so much pressure.
      Sarah talks about her feelings very honestly and openly and I hope you enjoy the book.

      Very best wishes
      Ruth x

  55. Kirsty Belton says:

    Hi after having twins 3 months early, spending nearly 3 months in hospital with them then losing my mum 2 days after they came home I was told its not PND just a phase….. some phase, been such a struggle but 2 years on I am finally feeling like I am slightly in control again!

    Wish people would be more real about what having children are like, its not like it looks in celeb land thats for sure 🙂

    Your book looks a great read and I am sure it will be very sucussefull

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Kirsty

      A phase? Who on earth said that to you? That’s so upsetting to hear. You probably had a bit of Postnatal Post Traumatic Stress too after losing your mum two days after giving birth.

      If we all had the resources, support and surgeons celeb mums had then I wouldn’t be doing what i do now! Their world is so completely different from ours. If OK magazine did an article on me, I would have reduced the birth rate substantially world wide!

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  56. Kerry FUlton says:

    Look forward to reading this

  57. Edith Onakpoya says:

    Its amazing,truly amazing. This is a fact that cuts accross borders and continents. I’m interested in the personality of Sarah!

  58. Leah says:

    Would love to win a copy to bring me a smile to my hazy baby sick day 😉

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Leah

      Good luck with the competition, just don’t let baby puke all over the book though!

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  59. aqeela says:

    The book sounds like something id enjoy reading – i have found motherhood difficult and not as expected, even though ive been blessed with a very good and intelligent child (thank God). Id love to read the book and then review it on my blog: aqeelas-house.blogspot.co.uk.
    Thanks for the chance to win a copy!
    Aqeela x

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Aqeela
      Motherhood doesnt always do what we want it to, but its important to remember who you are and not compare yourself to other mums as they may be putting on a front too.

      Would love to hear your feedback and good luck with the competition.

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  60. Aisha says:

    Hi

    love the sound of this – think was undiagnosed with pnd after 1st child and needed support but only realised myself afterwards….

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Aisha

      I wasn’t diagnosed either and, like you, realised I wasn’t right and so got myself better. I’m hoping that Sarah will awaken the NHS and society to the fact that women don’t always adapt straightaway and need help.

      Best wishes
      Ruth x

  61. Natalie says:

    Hi,
    This book looks amazing I have two children ATM trying for number 3 . I had PND with my 2nd who is now 6 years old not that it was ever diagnosed!! . I have just finished my Foundation degree in counselling friday 🙂 and I was in placement for a while within the perinatal team so really know how important awareness is. x

  62. Aisha says:

    Thanks a lot Ruth.. look forward to reading your book! X

  63. Tracy says:

    I am looking forward to reading this, after planning my first baby for 4 years I was overjoyed to finally be expecting, but after an horrendous pregnancy where I was sick for 9 months and a horrible birth (ending up in ICU for a week) I really struggled as my story wasnt like what happened on the telebox or other people. I felt I had nowhere to turn as everyone knew how much I wanted to be a Mum and I had no right to feel like I did! I was very lucky that my partner was so supportive, and with gentle nudges I got myself out meeting other mums i soon realised I wasnt alone. My 2nd baby was much easier thankfully and with the support of my friends and hubby didnt get PND.

    • ruth briddon says:

      Hi Tracy
      I know exactly what you mean about not feeling you can say youre not right. More understanding of this illness needs to be given.

      I wish you well.
      Ruth x

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